Tuesday, September 29, 2009

Paul Revere Was A Rapper

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Earlier today, I offered what is to date the most comprehensive, and honest, interpretation of DeShawn Stevenson's facial area tattoos. No one is anywhere near on my level. However, one important bit of information didn't make it through the editing process, perhaps because it was too dangerous. This being a free country, and this site mine and mine, I will use this space to reveal unto thee the true meaning of the two numbers five.

My bosses at SN decreed it obvious that these connected to Lincoln in that our greatest President appears on the five-dollar note. Then why two of them? That the font is identical serves doesn't make them an afterthought; had Stevenson wanted simply to ornament his Lincoln, he could've used something less cryptic or potentially fraught, like a log cabin or the Memorial. No, it's a clue, a signpost toward the life of The Man From Hope that we would be foolish to dismiss.

Scholars in the field of Great American Presidents know that 1855 was a pivotal year for Honest Abe, in which he overcame his personal troubles, rallied the Republican Party, and started himself down the road to immortality (and, as it were, premature mortality). I can only guess that Stevenson is trying to tell us something about his plans for 2009-10—it will be his 1855, or maybe that for the Wizards, who have not won a championship since sometime in the seventies.

Or, since Lincoln ruled the Republican, it could be a commentary on the Republican Party's recent spasms of joyous growth. I speak of the Tea Parties; maybe Stevenson is warning us of just how potent they are, or is himself a supporter reveling in their might. Only time knows all the answers.

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