How Dew U Wan Tit?

Seriously, fuck Lost. Go to the doctor. Read my ultimate Gil outpouring.

Friday Didn't Happen

You know Twitter has #FF, when no one says anything, or responds to anything, and the whole thing turns into an open-air bazaar for absolutely nothing? In honor of that, I'm doing a quick post here that's similarly pointless.

First, up top, an absolutely amazing drawing of Artis Gilmore from an old SI that, were this several years ago, we would be trying to put on a t-shirt. Now, I think the most we can do is put it up here and wave our arms some. Unless The Vault, which rules, wants to partner with us to do a series of old illo tees curated by us. Just a thought.

Last basketball: Very soon, I'm dropping a really long Gilbert Arenas piece over at The Baseline that I swear you will all love. Stay tuned.

Maybe you noticed that the store ads disappeared (for now) and ye olde Amazon widget moved up. I've decided to get back in the swing of that, partly for the added revenue stream, but in large part because I like writing blurbs about non-sports stuff. Up there now: Cooperstown Confidential, a Bloomsbury book that's less about scandal-mongering and more turning it's grotesquely, indiscriminantly mythic—and totally supra-American—past into something more believable. I think it saves history, while creating a bridge between those days and the imperfect present. I hope we manage that in the new book. Steven Johnson's The Ghost Map had me talking about cholera and shit to anyone who would listen in the week before my wedding, but is really worth it for the finale, where he smushes together the last sentence of every magazine feature he's ever written about civilization, evolution, terrorism, health, and the value of cities.

The Damned Don't Cry is one of those rare movies where Joan Crawford is both scary and hot, as well as a genre pic with layers, or maybe two genres at once. This coming from someone who watches at least one forgettable noir joint a week. I still don't get why there's a song on Africa Brass with the same name, and would prefer to not look it up. The Big O is well past my cut-off year for basketball memoirs, but Robertson's an intensely private man who decided to open up here, and as with his game and personality, you can feel the anger simmering just beneath the stately (okay, sometimes staid) prose. They Cleared the Lane is not only the single best book about race in the early NBA, but also, in its eye for detail, gives you some invaluable info and understanding of that era in general. Breaks my heart that this isn't more widely-read.

Finally, Heaven and Earth's I Can't Seem to Forget About You. Buying this import new is expensive, but there are cheaper used copies up there. The kind of sweet soul so haunting, and uneasy, it borders on scary. Oddly, "Let Me Back In" might be the song I most associate with my wedding weekend.

UPDATE: New column on Arenas now up and running.

FreeDarko/adidas Super-Bargain!!!!

Some of you may recall the Dwight Howard and Derrick Rose web spots we worked with adidas on. To pass the time this summer, adidas has decided to put some of Big Baby's Dwight Howard art on a shirt.

While the tee's been spotted in the New York store and at this summer's adidas Nations camp in Dallas, there has yet to be an official release. In the meantime, we've been given a limited number to play around with, so here's the special offer: spend $100 or more at the FreeDarko Imperial Outlet, and you'll get one of these FreeDarko/adidas joints before anyone else on your block for one penny. If you want, Big Baby, myself, and any other FD members will sign it for you, too.

Remember, we only have the stock we have, so be sure to check availability before placing your order, unless of course you just feel like buying that Kobe print for the hell of it. Which is always welcome, of course.

The Tide Giveth and Taketh

Next week, I will return to FreeDarko, and hopefully The Baseline will load reliably. In the meantime, you should check out this 2003 Roger Beebe video, which I just saw at an INCITE! screening on the subject of sports and aesthetics.

The Official FD Bracket Form

Pretty self-explanatory. We love intricate structures and an excuse for humorous, esoteric metaphors. So while I myself might spend this whole tournament trying to guess at Toney Douglas's pro potential in football, here's this for you to use and enjoy. Big Baby's illo is seriously mentally ill, and the names should be as correct as any significantly less visually amazing bracket you can get from Seth Davis's family.

DOWNLOAD THE FD BRACKET (at your own peril!!!)

BONUS UPDATE: Silverbird, Big Baby and myself visit with Jesse Thorn on The Sound of Young America:

Land Before Time: 2 Football

Wednesday's football flashback was only the beginning. Here you have the apex and the end of this phase in pre-Darko. Click on it to magnify and read. One time at a party in Philly, some guy told me he'd had this work blown up and framed for his living room. I had to rip this out of my only copy to scan it, thus possibly destroying my memorable essay on Their Satanic Majesties Request.

Don't forget to read this oath from yesterday, or my surprisingly wild interview with Clyde Drexler. And to dude who told me at Varsity Letters about his series of DIY All-Star songs, PLEASE GET IN TOUCH!!!!

Land Before Time: 1 Football

Way before FreeDarko was born, Big Baby and I used to do the occasionally sports-themed "column" for The Philadelphia Independent. In honor of the Super Bowl, here's one of them, about the NFL's best taking on a team of "inanimate objects." Click on it, it will grow, and then a magnifying glass will appear to aid your journey.

A few other items:

-FD now on Twitter. We don't quite know how to use it, I keep deleting things, and it's a lot less likely to sound right, but it's a nice distraction. And by all means, call us out for this stuff in the comments section right here.

-The Love of Sports interviews the double-oop team, and catches them in the act of another.

-I don't ordinarily recommend very young, very rough blogs that have nothing to do with sports, but anyone interested in politics should keep an eye on this one, by an old friend who also happens to be a true Movement OG. His first post may be about Obama and race, but there's new stuff there. Honest. I'm trying to help him clean up the look a little.